IF YOU want to save your marriage, psychology Professor Les Greenberg and his former doctoral student Susan Johnson may have the answer. They'll likely suggest EFT - emotionally focused therapy - as your salvation.

First thing? Admit you're a child, emotionally dependent on your partner. "Dependence" is something of a no-no in cognitive behavioural therapy circles, where it's generally mind-over-emotion.

All this emphasis on thinking about thinking (or feeling) can sometimes lead to too much reliance on one's head and not enough on one's heart, suggests Greenberg who pioneered a more emotionally focused system of therapy back in the early '80s. Needless to say, many cognitive therapists were (and still are) not impressed. But the results, for couples therapy anyway, are miraculous. An unprecedented 70 - 75 per cent of clients with marriage problems reported being happy with each other again after going the EFT route.

In cognitive behavioural therapy couples (and individuals) usually focus on communication skills. EFT on the other hand may suggest couples look at how emotionally dependent they are on their partner for their happiness.

"EFT is humanistic," says Greenberg. "It's about getting back in touch with feelings and then, perhaps, deal with the cognitive revolution that engenders. I think our culture [emphasizes] reason and control, over feeling. Cognitive therapy is interested in the quick fix -- that's why insurance companies like it. It's therapy that's economically driven."