By Valentina Galvis

In a series of posts, I will be discussing methods to identify, assess and resolve conflict that arises in interactions with colleagues, classmates, friends and other parties when interacting virtually. My hope is to provide some insight on how to adapt well-established conflict resolution and de-escalation strategies as we continue to work and study from home. I think it is important to develop and use these skills to ensure that once we gradually return to in-person environments, there is no presence of conflict with those who we interact with the most but haven’t seen in person in many months.

Conflict Behind the Screen

Conflict is inevitable, it can arise in all aspects of our lives and at times it can be uncomfortable or difficult to resolve. While conflict can be perceived as a negative thing, it can also be turned into an opportunity. Dealing with conflict allows us to learn, engage in dialogue and develop an increased understanding of the needs and wants of those around us.  Pre-COVID many of us frequented our university campus, our workplaces and entertainment venues. Now, all the activities we would do in these physical spaces have been adapted to online delivery and the way we communicate has radically changed.

We have been frequently communicating virtually since the early 2000’s when access to AOL, MSN, MySpace and SMS services gained popularity and became more accessible to those with internet connections. Though the advances in technology and social media platforms have allowed us to stay connected, the removal of face-to-face interactions allows conflict to be perceived differently.

Think about when you receive a message where the writer has used all caps, or perhaps the punctuation makes it seem like the person is upset. The way we each perceive electronic communication varies. The fact that we can’t see the other person's expressions, mannerisms or hear their tone of voice, can lead to misinterpretation of messaging or create conflict. Hiding behind a screen and forgetting that there is a human, with feelings and emotions on the other side of a message can also empower certain individuals to take a harsher tone or be more vocal on issues that they otherwise would not engage with in person. Due to the pandemic, we have been forced to work with individuals we have never met in person, and this can be difficult due to the complexities associated with virtual communication. It is much easier to gauge different personalities when starting a new job, or attending a new class, but in this virtual environment, it becomes difficult to get to know new people and to understand their communication styles. Inevitably, this can lead to increased conflict which can contribute to us feeling more isolated than we already do when working and studying from home.

After attending the Quick Intervention Skills for De-Escalating Conflict training by The Neighbourhood Group, I was able to grasp a better understanding of various conflict resolution approaches and have found the interest-based approach to be a good alternative to apply to conflict that arises in a virtual working and studying environment. In the next series of posts throughout the summer, I will introduce the various approaches to conflict resolution and provide guidance and tips on how to best translate those approaches while considering the difficulty that arises with communicating with others through video and phone calls.